Dear Independent Woman

Picture this,

Wife: I’m going to the store.

Husband: No, babe, let me go to the store.

Wife: No, I can do it myself.

Husband: Why don’t you ever want me to help you?

Are you the wife who never lets your husband help you with anything? Well, I’ll admit that this woman is me.  Sometimes I’m so busy being independent  and get so caught up in doing things for myself and “getting my money” that I forget that I have been blessed to have someone who is willing to help me.

My husband and I have been together for 4 years and we’ve have recently gotten married. Although, I don’t think of myself as relationship expert I think that I’ve been in my relationship long enough to speak on this topic. And honestly, I think so many of us women act like this and don’t even realize it. So let’s talk about it now. Remember, two weeks ago when I talked about, “Being Superwoman,” and how you still need to ask for help when you need it? Think of this as a derivative of that post. If you are in a relationship remember to let your man do for you.

Admitting is the first step to freedom and the second step is determining why you’re so independent. My answer is simple, I picked up my habits from my mother. That’s right, she created a monster. My mother was a single parent, pretty much until I went to college. So growing up I watched my mother do everything by herself. She went to school every night (sometimes I had to accompany her), worked full time, did ministry and made sure my older sister and I had everything we needed without a man’s help. So, naturally, because I was raised by an independent woman, I became independent, too.

For relationships this can be a blessing and a curse. It’s a blessing because you can bring something to the table to add to your relationship; and your survivor instincts will kick in if something happens to your partner or if you end up having to break up or divorce. On the flip side too much independence can be a curse because you will burn yourself out trying to do everything on your own and even put your relationship at risk. So when I find myself falling into too much independence, I literally have to put myself in check. I also, have to remember that I have a responsible loving husband, so why shouldn’t I let him help me? I had to gather the courage to just let him do it and it felt sooooo good. The benefits of letting him help me are simply tremendous! It took a lot of stress off of me, boosted his confidence as my provider, built more trust between us and it proved to me that I am truly loved.

The purpose of this post is not to convince you not to be independent. Heck, I love working, making money, doing some things for myself, just as much as you do. This is just to remind you that a man desires to make his wife happy, so why not help him help you? If you don’t allow him to help normally the moment he doesn’t offer you will be looking at him side ways! Just try it. I promise you it is rewarding on both sides.

Bolder Sisters, what will give you the courage to allow your man to help you?

blog-profileDominique Mcgee is a motivational blogger who resides in the south suburbs of Chicago with her husband. She has a Bachelor of Arts in English and a minor in Communication Arts from Trinity Christian College in Palos Heights, IL. Her other interests include DIY, fashion and lifestyle blogging. Dominique says if she is not motivating and uplifting women she is not fulfilling her purpose.  To read her blog, visit She Fly Now

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