Could What You Fear Really Happen?

 

I believe in the power of coaching. I know myself and know I perform best when I have someone to hold me accountable. Sometimes I break the promises I make to myself (seriously working on this) but I tend to keep the ones I make to other people. That’s why I’m overjoyed to be working with a leadership coach. See, I’m ready to truly break completely out of that shy girl mode in my daytime position. I’ve had wins, but I’ve also still had those moments of doubt.

My new coach arrived right on time. We had our first meeting a couple of weeks ago and she has already challenged me on what has me worried the most. The assignment she left me with was to keep track daily of what I worried about and what was the actual result. And to my surprise (not really a surprise) out of all that I worried about, none of it happened. None of it.

This has been what’s held me back for so long, I put so much energy into worrying about things and outcomes that didn’t happen. It affected the way I presented information and how much I dreaded feedback, good or bad. 

My coach, I can already tell, is really going to push me out of some very comfortable places I’ve established. And I need it. It’s time I got uncomfortable. She also asked me to monitor, throughout my day, what standard I was trying to live up to, where it came from, and what happens when I don’t meet that standard on that day. With these exercises, I was able to do a great deal of inner work and my discoveries have been eye opening.

I worry too much about failing. And it isn’t serving me well. What I’m learning is to shift my thinking from failure to success. By asking myself what needs to take place in order for me to be successful with this project, this article, or this idea, will help me to properly prepare. The more prepared I am, the less likely I am to worry about failing. It’s about replacing that stinking thinking with a positive plan of actions.

Our negative thoughts will stop us in our tracks every time if we continue to feed into them. Another great takeaway from my coach, so far, is to pay attention to my body language and take a deep breath whenever I feel anxious. I usually play with my necklace whenever I’m worried. And that’s my sign to pause, breath and keep pushing.

Bolder Sisters, if worry is preventing you from moving forward or taking a leap of faith, shift that thinking. Consider what you’ll need to be successful and put your energy there. Again, usually what we fear the most isn’t even that likely to happen.

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